Thursday, October 20, 2011

How Not To Win An Argument

I didn't like the way she treated me and my date, so I just decided to call her fat.

That's basically what I heard on the morning news. A customer in a restaurant claims the waitress didn't wait on them the way they expected and even brought them the wrong thing. So on the bottom of his receipt he wrote that she could stand to lose some weight. When the picture of the receipt was shown I noticed he didn't even spell lose correctly.

Along with showing the world his rudeness he also showed us his lack of proper education... I wonder if he made a good impression on his date with that. Was she as cold hearted and ignorant as him...

This is not the first time I have heard or heard of someone attacking anothers looks when they were angry about something completely different. Seems that a simple mind can only resort to something easy to attack when it's angry.

Problem is when you attack someone for things they are comfortable with and they accept, it can backfire.

This waitress took it on line to allow the world to know what a wonderful person that guy is. Now should we see him with a date, we will also know what kind of a person that date is that chooses to be with someone like that.

Perhaps that waitress was busy and was having a tough time keeping up. Is it her fault? No, that would be the fault of management for not having more waitresses during a busy period. Perhaps there was a mix up in the order. In a crowded restaurant with many people chatting at once I don't understand how anyone can hear.

Thing is, if you have something legitimate to complain about, that is what you complain about. You do not go around flapping your jaws and attacking someone's looks. To the observer that makes you look wrong and whatever you felt was wrong no longer has any bearing at all.

I've watched this kind of thing happen and it always works the same. The real problem gets lost in the rude comment and nothing gets settled.

It does sometimes get interesting when a loud mouth runs into a secure person. I did once observe an anorexic looking girl mouthing off to a heavy girl about needing to lose some weight. But the heavier girl whipped up her shirt and told the skinny girl, yah, but you'll never have these if you keep puking them out. The skinny mini had her words taken from her mouth.

You'll seldom see a little guy mouth off to a big guy because he knows the big guy may just give him a proper thrashing. That too I have personally observed.

If you didn't like the way your boss did something and you garnered the courage to confront him, would you bring his bald head and beady eyes into the conversation? Not if you had any desire to keep your job...

It takes intelligence to win any disagreement. Remember, just because someone shuts up does not mean you won. It just means the other person is done arguing with you and no longer feels you can learn a thing.

Disagreements are only won when both sides agree on an equal remedy and walk away with a smile.

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