Friday, April 8, 2011

Lies Hurt

This hasn't happened to me for a long time (I don't think it has), but in the past...
I've lost people I thought were friends because someone would say something about me. When I would find out what was said, it turned out it was a bold faced lie. Like I supposedly said something about someone that I never said. Even someones deluded interpretation of something I've said.

Maybe the worst of it all is when someone says that they were told you've done or said something but then will not tell you what it was that you've done or said. How can you defend against something if you don't even know what it is? Then you can't even find out who said you said... Can't even look them in the eye!

Probably the saddest I have ever heard of was a family member who was completely abandoned by her family. All she hears is that because of what she said they want nothing to do with her. They don't answer her calls or letters and don't even invite her or her husband to family holiday celebrations. All without even letting her make an attempt to defend herself! The kicker here, no one will tell her what she was to have said!

I've known many who have gone through this and even hear of many more. Don't get me wrong, I can understand cutting useless ?friends? out of your life but family! Yet maybe I value family higher than many. For me family is all you really have when the chips are totally down and your back's against the wall. I only have one friend who would be there in a real time of need. All the rest may say they would but yah, right... They suddenly are to busy.

Why people would do this kind of thing is so far beyond my imagination that as hard as I try I can't figure it out.
Maybe jealousy. But why be jealous. We all have the chance to do what we want and what we can.

Maybe a deep rooted deceit for the one they are lying about. Yet how could you possibly justify hating that bad? Hate eats you up from within. Your hate works at killing you. You spend all your effort on hating others and where is the time to live? I feel, forgiveness is the best revenge.

Someone who lies about others will eventually be found out. It may take quite a while but, it will happen. Then the liar looses. The biggest thing they lose is their integrity. They also lose friends. Who will trust a liar? How can a liar even trust their self?

But the victim of the lie. There is another person left with a broken heart. Someone else who can't bring their self to trust. Feeling lonely in crowds. Trying to sleep at night with the question “why” stuck in their head. One more lost soul with heartbreak.

How does it make a weak person feel good about their self when they lie about someone? Surely it can not! They may feel good for a moment, but moments pass real quickly.
In stead of telling lies to make yourself feel better. Try making a friend of that person.
Don't use lies as vengeance. Use kindness and forgiveness. That! Will hurt more than a lie. If the other person really did something that bad that you would want to tell a lie about them, kindness and forgiveness will hurt more.

Lies don't ruin good people. It may take a while to get over the hurt. Yet they will heal.
Lies only ruin the liar...

Sorry for the rant today. It has been bothering me and I needed to say it.
OK, I'm off to do what needs done. Then see someone who was hurt by a lie.
I'll get a smile on their face. And I'll be smiling with them!!!


  1. You say, lies only ruin the liar. So true.

    I've dealt with 2 family members that lie about everything!! Well, after many years of their lies, and people, family members, friends, etc., realizing just how much they lie, and their lies hurt people, they're pretty much done for. Kind of like the boy that cried, "WOLF!" People get their "number", and just don't want to have anything to do with them, and don't believe a word they say, with good reason. Pathalogical liars are very good and convincing. I believe in giving people chances, but if they keep blowing those chances, oh well...tell-a-tubby-bye-bye!! If someone doesn't add to your life, it's time to disassociate yourself from them. People like that, love making others miserable. They like pointing their fingers at others, but need to realize, when they point that finger, there are three more fingers pointing back at them! I don't tolerate liars very well! Don't let it happen!! Only YOU have control of YOU!

  2. Hi Melodie! Little tales and stories don't bother me. Matter of fact I enjoy those. But lies! That hurt others... Them I despise! Yes. Liars hurt their self in the end. All they do to the others is mess up their lives for a while. Give them more heartbreak to fight through. It just really ... well you know!
    Catch ya later