I introduced you to my old buddy Max last weekend. Like I said he was about the best friend a guy could ever ask for. He was one fantastic dog. But Max had his ways...
One winter evening it was decided we would have a small party. A few friends, some good eats and plenty of cold beer. Now it was one of those bitter cold winter evenings so Max was in the house so he wouldn't have to suffer the bitter cold.
We all enjoyed the lively conversation while a movie played in the background. Drinking our beer and having a really great time. Ole Max, well he made plenty of rounds, getting attention and the occasional dropped chip. He was into the party idea himself. He just naturally liked people. On the very rare occasion he didn't... There was a reason. But, he wouldn't get angry, he'd just leave. In all the years he was with me I only saw him show someone his teeth once. But I felt the same about that guy...
We all had a great time and finally the call came from the kitchen that food was ready, come and get it. So all of us went to the kitchen and loaded our plates, maybe overloaded, with plenty of foods. Some stayed in the kitchen, which was huge, and some of us, mostly the guys, headed back into the living room. We walked in and there was Max. Just sitting there as nice as could be, with an I didn't do it look.
And there were a bunch of beer cans, now laying empty on the floor. Uh hu... Max had himself a few drinks. Wild thing was, not one puddle of beer on the carpet. I just shook my head. Never saw him do that before... I did scold him a bit but doubt if that had any significance to him. Seldom did... Someone ran back to the kitchen and got some more beers out of the tub of ice and brought them back in.
We opened our beers and set them on the stands and coffee table and sat back and continued to eat. Max, like the king of the domain he was, walked right on over to the coffee table, reached up with his paw and tipped over one of the beers. Before it could begin to soak into the carpet he had it lapped up! I was angry but wow was I impressed.
I growled at him and scolded him, telling him NO, don't do that again. Well he gave me his, who do you think you are look, then went and laid down.
He laid down near the guy whose beer he had just swiped. After finishing his plate of food, my buddy took out a cigarette and lit it up. No big deal, back then we all smoked.
Well... He had to take things a bit farther. He was harboring a grudge with Max about his beer. So, he began blowing smoke in Max's face. Now Max could take care of himself and could move so I didn't get to angry. I just warned the guy that if he kept messing with Max, he would regret it. Max... He just had his ways of pay back... He didn't usually get mad, he got even. Eh, this guy took it a bit farther with a few more puffs of smoke and laughed.
Max finally had enough and got up and moved. He went over by the doorway and laid down.
The party went on for a while and finally died down. People went to the kitchen door, put their shoes and coats on and left. Some who had more than enough to drink stayed and slept on the floor, couch and chairs.
Early next morning we got up and had some breakfast. After eating, the guy who was harassing Max decided it was time to leave. He walked over slipped into his coat then proceeded to put his shoes on. Suddenly he looked and said, my shoe is soaked, then looked towards the ceiling for a leak.
He put the soaked shoe near his nose and shouted, someone P'd in my shoe!
Yup, ole Max got even... While we slept Max took care of business right in his shoe. The guy got a bit angry and was giving Max dirty looks until I reminded him that I warned him about the smoke in Max's face. He huffed a bit, put on his wet shoe and left.
I mean to tell ya we still laugh about that. And when I see him he's still called P shoe, even though that was well over thirty years ago.
So yah, be careful who you mess with. They may get even...
And hey, P shoe Paul. If ya ever read this, hows that squishy P shoe? Are ya pickin on any dogs lately old buddy?
Tales of a lonely ole guy with a sense of humor...