Monday, July 18, 2011

Clean Up


My house is a disaster! It needs cleaned really bad but where do I start... Everywhere I look there is clutter. Some is from me and the rest is from my son. Most is simply because I have to much stuff. Yet when I look around there is not much I can do without.

I've spent a lifetime amassing all the gismo's and gadgets I have and they all serve a useful purpose. But there isn't enough storage space for it all. When the clutter is straightened up though it's not to hard to clean. There are papers and receipts that need to be filed away. Yah, probably some a lot that need filled in the trash.

There are some tools that were carried in while hidden in the pockets and need taken back to the garage and put in the tool box. There are some power tools that need to go back to the shop. They were from projects done over the winter and were just never put away.

It's not good to have two guys living in a house without someone to give them casual direction on putting tools away. (AKA nagging) Unlike women, we find it natural to look at tools. They make us feel good, they make us feel comfortable and we know that as soon as they're put away we'll need them again. So what's the point...

So I'm trying to decide where to start. Trying desperately to devise a plan of action. I've tried just sitting here and hoping it would all get up and put itself away or where it needs to be, but that's like looking at the vacuum and wishing it would suck all the dirt up by itself... I've even wished upon a star for a good fairy to come and wave her magic wand! Nope, no help there...

So how to declutter and get rid of stuff you don't want or don't need...
Hmm, maybe get angry at it! Think I'm kidding? Just let it sit there long enough. It keeps getting in your way. You constantly have to move it to clean around it. You constantly have to clean it. Every breathing moment of life it keeps getting in your way until, until insanity sets in.

You naturally get angry at it anyway right? So why not get angry at it right away? Go ahead, call it all the nasty names you can think of while it sits there laughing at you and thinking it's safe. Sure that it will be around and cozy for a long time to make you feel bad and drive you crazy.

If one would get angry enough they'd probably end up with a nice bonfire which would warm their heart and make them feel happy. Or maybe end up with a heap of junk the trash collector will shake his head at. Making him think someone else put their trash with yours...

Ahh, but a nice bonfire... While standing around the bonfire you could do a victory dance. Yah, and then probably try grabbing something you shouldn't have thrown out from the raging flames of the inferno...

While boxing or bagging up that junk, you could take out all your frustrations by smashing it to itty bitty pieces. That would make it impossible to later relent and feel sorry for that junk and take it back into your house so it can further aggravate you and laugh at you for your weakness...

Maybe some helpful tips to make smashing it up easier! Remember the time when the kids turned up their noses to that meal you worked on and slaved at to make it special for them. Think about the huney do list. Think about the last hundred people who angered you...

Well, whatever it will take to get this nasty boring job done I'll just have to come up with. For now though I think I'll pour another cup of coffee and ponder this situation a bit more. That should help, shouldn't it?


What do you do to get motivated to clean up the clutter? How do you once and for all get rid of the junk that gets accumulated? Why hasn't someone came up with and automatic clutter cleaner? Hmm, remember Rosie the robot from the Jetson's, she's the one I need.


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