Wednesday, January 2, 2013

Time for a nap

Woke up New Years day with people in beds, people on chairs and the sofa and people on the floor. The dogs had an olympic obstacle course to go through, around and across to get out the door!
The day didn't end there. We laughed, talked, partied and played all day and shared one more great feast late in the afternoon. Finally the house began to clear out until I was finally alone and began to really feel the tired.

I had decided to have one last hurrah before Thanksgiving. Decided to one more time have a holiday season like I remembered from my childhood. All the great foods and all the wonderful company. Now being that few have the desire to do the cooking and baking that makes that possible I took it all on my own.

I wonder if my children and grandchildren will carry on... I wonder if any friends will pick up and make the decision to carry on... I wonder if any will invite me...
I said going into this that it would be my last. It's now up to others to carry on. Next year this country club is closed for business.

I will still be baking the cookies and making the candy simply because they make great gifts and I too enjoy eating the goodies.
The festive belly filling meals though are done.
It's not that it's a really hard job, it's just that this body is old and worn out and spending that much time on my feet to do all that cooking is more than I can deal with without feeling so much pain that I lose interest in enjoying.
I'm alone and don't have someone to share the kitchen and work with.

Same reason the farm has become smaller with less animals I keep and fields I plant. I now only keep enough animals and plant enough fields to keep me busy and pass the days. My glory days are over.

Without help it's just too much for one body to do. Should the son decide to finally make this his way of life it's here and he can do with it as he wants. I'll be around to answer his questions, offer advice and help him, but the major work will be his responsibility.
At the moment though he is busy getting his life on a good path and I do believe he is busy chasing the girls.

My girl chasing days are also over and after the events of the first half of last year I'm kinda thinking I don't even want them coming after me any longer.

I don't figure I have too many years left and I'm not up to playing any games.
When I decide what I want to do, I do it. I put forth the effort and get what I want, when I want it.
I darned sure don't tag others along on a whim of an idea or a fantasy dream.

So since I will be doing it alone, over the next few years I will be finding that place in a warmer climate to spend my winters. Then after New Years I will be spending my time there away from the frigid cold, snow and ice.
Only snag in that is I'll have to make a trip back in February for my granddaughters birthday. But one or two days of braving the winter should be easy enough to take. If not I can always dedicate a day to only her when I get back in the spring.

For sure I like smiling and sharing smiles. Even if I'm alone I like smiling and I do it. Being in a warmer climate for my winters will make that smiling much easier and less pain filled.

I can have whatever I want and I will. Except for that one person who could make it bliss...

For now though all I want is to finish cleaning up, which should only take about another hour and then to take a long, long nap. Maybe a nap until tomorrow.

I spoke to the dogs and they agree. Since the chores for the day are done and when the cleanup is finished they too will be joining in a long nap in a nice comfortable warm bed.

So have a wonderful day filled with smiles and remember to share those smiles.

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