Things Learned

The path to what you want begins right beyond your excuses.

If you really want it, you need to step over the excuses.

Like what I'm learning

Where my home is, winter is a beast.

It wasn't so when I was younger. Winter never bothered me. I enjoyed being out in a snow storm plowing snow, shoveling snow or playing. Very seldom did I ever have to really bundle up. The cold was something I could laugh at.

As this body has aged, been beaten up by me and has broken down in some ways, that same cold now causes pain. Pain in the joints and pain in my mind.

So some time back I had decided to start looking for somewhere to spend my winters. Somewhere not quite as snowy or cold, yet somewhere not too warm.

When I was in Southern Indiana before I fell in love with the rolling hills. Liked the people I had met and those I talked to in passing.

Asked people here about their winters. What they explained, sounded like the worst of my spring and fall back home.

So I finally decided on my adventure. A adventure to seek a place to spend my January's and February's away from my normal winters. Also a trip and time away from the normal to see if I could once again discover my mind and myself.

This being the absolute worst winter in many years may have made this an insane idea. But in my pea brain it made sense. If I find the worst and can tolerate that, I can certainly tolerate anything better during normal winters.

Well, it's down right cold here. A whopping 27 degrees this morning. Slight wind too. So I finally had to don more than a short sleeve sweatshirt. I had to put on a long sleeve shirt underneath.

Hey, it's above 0 degrees! Less than that is what I left. This feels great to me.

I may not get much more fishing done while I'm here though because the ice won't melt from along the river banks. And I have no desire to fall. I did have a slight slip on Tuesday which had me looking for a chiropractor yesterday. With what's left of my back that is nothing new for me. Yet pushing my luck challenging ice wouldn't be a good idea.

I had the time to check out a cave where the guy who started this town stayed with his family when he first got here. It's not so much a cave as a deep hollow cut into the rock cliffs. Yet I can understand how it would have made good shelter and protection. It does have a wonderful view of the river also.

I'm hoping today to find some access areas along the river with good accessibility where maybe I can fish and not have to challenge steep banks that are muddy and ice covered.

I've already felt the affects of my escape on my mind. I'm feeling more relaxed, more open already. Maybe creativity will return. Maybe desire will return. Maybe, maybe, maybe...

I'll be leaving here in a few more days and heading farther to the south. Will that be the area I find I like more? Who knows, but instead of fighting the old, I am attempting to understand the new and build on that.

Ball Shadow? Smile

So the groundhog saw his shadow...

Well when I left home early yesterday morning it was in the 40's. No snow, no rain, no clouds. I guess it could have been possible for that rodent to see his shadow. With all the lights from the cameras on him, how could he not see his shadow?

You can check out Phil's site at groundhog.org

On the way out of Pennsylvania I did find some rain. Didn't mind that since there was a lot of salt to be washed from under my SUV. Then almost to Columbus the weather got dry. It was still overcast which I appreciated. It's nice to not have bright sun blinding you.

It was great until I passed Louisville. It really greeted me to Indiana.

Ha, ha! Here drive in a snow globe.

I drove around after checking in at the hotel to make sure I still remembered my way around since the last trip here.

Amazing! I do.

Heck I even made a turn and thought I went the wrong way but quickly found what I was looking for anyway.

It's definitely warm here as compared to home. I e-mailed someone I know here to ask about some backroads I intend to travel on and ask about their condition during the winters. Got the answer I had figured on. Mud rut city. This should be fun!!!

The ball went well.

Danced a few slow dances with my grand daughter and then chatted with the other dads and grandpa's while the young girls were busy dancing with each other.

I am still trying to decide whether or not to put some pictures here. Something inside is telling me no. Maybe it's because she is so young. Maybe it's just something that will come to light in the future. I just don't know why I'm feeling no. But I've learned to listen to that voice inside.

Well, I'm off to play in the mud and snow and see what kind of orneriness I can find to do today for some smiles.

Teach a while and make a smile

My daughter who is alone now, raising two children by herself, needed a new light hung above her kitchen sink.

Normally my son helps his sister when she needs something done. He was working when she called so feeling this bad case of wintertime blues I knew I had to leave the warm comfort of home and do something.

When my son helps he's like many people and does it for her.

I on the other hand believe in the old saying:

“Give a man a fish and he eats for the day. Teach a man to fish and he eats forever.”

So instead of just doing it for her, I had her come and help. Did what I could to teach her as I was doing and left her do much of what I felt she could. All the while she watched, helped and learned.

Some believe women can't or shouldn't do home repairs and remodeling.

That is just not true.

Over the years I had women working along with me while running my business. After teaching them, they often outworked men. Did a nicer job and were cleaner while working. Paid much more attention to detail.

When tasks demanded strength I'd ask them to use they're minds to figure out how to handle it. Sometimes I'd help them along while learning to use their minds instead of their bodies. I'd enforce what I believe in.

“Anything the mind can conceive and believe in, can be achieved.”

Need to lift a heavy item that is too cumbersome for one? Levers and blocking, raising one end at a time is the way to go.

There are times when it takes two to move some things. Then is when you seek help. Of course there are times when help is handy that you simply ask for that help to move the job along faster.

I and my son are still here to help but by teaching her, should the time ever come that she needs to do something alone she can.

Why do for, when you can teach how?

Teaching and helping others helps builds their self confidence. Along with that self confidence comes a healthy attitude and smile.

Teaching your daughter helps show she “needs” no man, but can have one if and when she wants. And that she doesn't have to settle for a sorry excuse of a man just to have one to do things.

That too should allow her to keep a smile.

A Ball?

Six days before I leave. Wouldn't you know it would have to get so cold the grandkids have no school! And of course, who gets to watch them.

I have preparations to make, bags to pack, fishing equipment to finish getting ready, arrangements to make and who knows what I haven't thought of yet.

Oh well, there is still some food that needs used up before I leave. Wouldn't want to come home in a month to things growing in the refrigerator...

I was planning to leave the last day of this month, but a very pretty young lady asked me of all people to take her to a ball. 

A BALL!

Me who doesn't even own a pair of real dress pants let alone a torture suit. Hasn't looked at his hangman's nooses in years. Had to wipe years of dust from his dress shoes. At least they still looked good under their protective coating of dust.

I promised myself many years ago I would never again don clothes I couldn't feel totally comfortable getting dirty in.

But oh no, a cute little girl had to come along and make me break that promise.

Yet what can a guy do when his grand daughter asks for him to be her date...

So it was off to torment shacks err stores, to look for and buy new clothes. Clothes that I swear will only be worn once!

Hunting through styles that look goofy for five hours until I finally found something acceptable.

Maybe I really did outlive my lifetime...

Why can't I just wear a T shirt and jeans? What's wrong with my comfortable black Nike's? Why in the name of humanity do I have to put on a hangman's noose to choke my Adams apple and make my neck itch?

Grand daughter, that's why.

Somewhere out in the cosmos there is a gang of angels laughing. Holding their stomachs in pain from the laughter. All dancing around singing “We gotcha, we gotcha, ha ha haa ha haa ha.

Yes they knew there was no woman who could convince me I ever had to dress up again. So they blessed me with a wonderful grand daughter. A sweet young thing with a smile that could light the darkest night.

And she even delayed my escape from the bone chilling cold and my fishing trip.

Ugh, wonder if I can still remember how to dance with anyone but myself while out in a field when the mood strikes to nothing but the music in my head!

Oh well, she'll only be young once.

So smile as you imagine an old, broken down fool on a dance floor.

I will be : )

But she'll have this memory and smile forever.

Privacy

It's not that I have no expectations of privacy. But heck if the government or anyone else wants to keep records of my phone conversations they're in for a very boring book.

A recent call I made: Hey, whats for dinner today? Daughter sounding very ill, I don't know. Hmm, you don't sound very good. How bad is it? Not too bad, I think the worst is over. Well I have dinner almost finished, so sometime around noon you and the kids come on up. OK, see you then.

Another call I made: Hey, before you come home can you pick up... Yah, I can do that.

These are two examples of the majority of the calls I make. Could you imagine records after records of that kind of conversation?

There are some business type calls, but not a one where I say anything I wouldn't say in public. There are many calls I say no thank you and hang up. A few with over zealous sales people where I may say something nasty and then hang up. When I say no, I do mean no after all. When I'm in the middle of doing something and a sales person I didn't ask anything of calls or in the midst of a warm meal, I do not want bothered!

Heck, if I don't look for something I don't want called asking me to buy.

I learned a long time ago that if I want anything really kept private, I have to keep it locked in the recesses of my mind.

Trusted friends have a way of leaking things. Trusted lovers have a way of blabbing what was said in confidence when they tire of you. Even to the point of using what you said against you!

Bullies way back in the young school days would use what you said to bully you.

Anything said that you think is in private and will never go anywhere can and will. Often faster than the speed of light!

The only way to keep what you want to keep private is to never allow it to escape your mind.

Use it against me. Been down that road and I'm still here and laughing.

Use it as a book? Well at least send me a share of the royalties if there is someone who will ever buy it.

What I don't like though is that you will be using a huge amount of the tax payers money to warehouse all the dribbles of useless information.

Change. Thanks I needed that?

She was comfortable in my fingers. She made me feel good. She kept me company. She kept me informed. Was always there when I needed her most.

I enjoyed her body and never had desires for another.

I would keep her with me all day and sometimes never utter a word. She would lie beside me at night always ready. She went fishing with me and often never bothered me as my mind would wonder off into the distance pondering the matters of the world. She'd be there as I gardened waiting patiently as I paid her no attention. Ride quietly at my side all day as we rode the fields on the tractor.

So what if she was getting old. She only needed more time warmly sleeping in her cradle. Waiting for me to awaken her and take her in my hands.

We had years together wondering through the fields and woods. Shared time together, images of what we had seen.

But alas, she's been rudely replaced.

What part of “I do not like change” do you not understand son?

I'm old too! Are you going to replace me?

Just because I was looking at pretty new models, doesn't mean I wanted them. I was only looking to see if they had changed. If there could even be another I could possibly want in my life.

Oh well, even after spending hours preparing her for a life with me. Even though I had to take all that time learning her intricacies. Getting to know her and explaining how I preferred things to be between us. Touching her in places to make her respond. Eyeing her and learning her desires of where and how she wanted touched. Observing her reactions when she didn't like my moves.

I do appreciate the new cell phone.

But I still stand by what I said. I DO NOT LIKE CHANGE!