Been
alone four months short of twelve years now. Yup, November of 1999.
Not so much as a date for a cup of coffee. Not one sweet kiss or soft
warm hug. No one to wake up and face a new day. No one to share with,
no one to play with.
Now
I'm pretty much past the worst of it. Maybe even totally past it...
They do say if you don't use it you lose it. Usually even the
emotional part is very often only a brief passing thought. Yet Sunday
evening the emotional was all I could think about. I was talking to
someone and trying to help them with their problem of loneliness and
danged if it didn't settle into me.
They
had mentioned the love like the man who after three weeks had finally
found his wife safe from harm. They mentioned the look in both their
eyes as they were reunited. Even having lost everything they owned,
they were just happy and felt blessed with each other.
I'm
kinda getting old and may well never know that kind of feeling for
someone. That fear is just there and there is not much I can possibly
do about it. It's just a part of my life because of the choices I
made and for better or worse, I'll live with it. Yet at times it
causes some profound thought in my goofy mind.
I
doubt there are many who could make the choice to be alone that I did
and really stick to it. There are times I look back and wonder how I
did. There were many lonely days spent while choking back tears
filled with emotion. There have been many lonely winter days and
nights filled with an emptiness that is beyond imagination. Meals fit
for a king that were only eaten by a lonely ole fool. Many play times
spent playing alone. Many warm evenings spent rocking alone on the
porch.
However,
I constantly see so many who clearly show they take their partners
for granted. Kind of treat them the same as an old pair of favorite
shoes. Only pay attention to them when the need arises. Only show
they care when they need or want something from them.
Forgetting
to do the little things that gives the other a warm smile and lets
them know they still have value in their life. That their cared
about. Even forgetting more important things like birthdays,
Valentines day and such. Yet they expect them to be there when they
get home.
Even
an old cow who's hungry, thirsty, uncared for, but fenced in with
barbed wire, will break a hole in the fence and look elsewhere for
what it needs. It'll slice it's hide open, endure the pain and bleed
to break free of it's cage and seek out the things it desires.
I
can completely understand that. The overwhelming desire, thirst and
hunger, will give any living creature courage to face it's fears and
put up with any pain to get what it wants or needs.
But
humans are not kept in barbed wire. Unless they have done something
really bad, they are not kept in a pen or cell. The only thing
between them and what they desire or need, is a door. A simple turn
of a handle and they're free. Free to search for what the want or
need.
I
do not understand though. What makes the ones who take their partners
for granted, think they won't lose what they have? What gives them
the secure feeling that when they get home the partner will be there
waiting. Or does even that thought never cross their minds?
It's
an old saying, but oh so true.
You
never know what you've got, til it's gone...
Like
what you've read? Know someone who needs to hear what was said?
Why
not take a few seconds and click on that Join button? Tell a friend
and share what's here. Help out a little to maybe make this silly
world just a little better for everyone to enjoy. Leave a comment or
complaint. Just comment and say hi. I'd surely appreciate knowing I'm
not just wasting my time...
No comments:
Post a Comment