Monday, January 13, 2014

Frrrrrigid Thoughts

Just some dumb thoughts while living in and surviving the deep freeze of the past week.

Flash freezing while getting the mail from the box is in no way fun. I'd rather be flash dancing.

Polar Vortex sounds much warmer than it feels.

How fast can one scurry to the mailbox?

While watching the news and seeing many cars stuck in ice.
Hmm why can't the mailman who brings the darned bills get stuck like that...

While seeing my reflection in a window.
40 pounds fatter? No, 4 layers.

Wonder if the chickens would be considerate enough and not use the carpet as a toilet if I left them in...

Went to feed the chickens, not a one came to greet me. I opened their door to make sure they weren't frozen. They didn't even look at me while they were perched like sardines under their heat lamp.
Wonder if I could squeeze in between them...

Just where are those Florida like temperatures Al Gore promised me?

Is hugging a radiator lewd? I don't care, this warms me up more than Playboy did as a teen.

Cabin fever? No. Pillow fort fever!

I refuse to answer the phone. Want to talk to me at least come share some body heat.

Went to the basement to get a few things from the canning cupboard. Peeked at the fuel oil tanks. Nooooooo! I need to order more heating fuel and it's not even February.

Who needs a cold shower when you can just get a warm one and then freeze when you get out.

When I took a black ice skid on the sidewalk and was laying there taking a mental parts evaluation before trying to get up.
Hope no one saw that.
Huh, if I was knocked out I'd have been well preserved.
Man this is going to hurt tomorrow! And it does.

Someone needs to invent a dog ejector to get them outside so they don't use the floor as a potty.

Yay! 0 degrees feels like a heat wave!

Heard people from the south complaining about cold while watching the news.
Want to swap homes for the winter?

I just know it's going to warm up here next month when I leave for the south...




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