Ever ask yourself what exactly it is
your wanting for?
A great paying job with lots of cash
rewards. A great place to live and be where the sun shines all the
time and it's warm. A perfect someone to spend your life with. Or
some thing you believe would make you happy.
If it's a great paying job you may have
to accept that it's much like a garden. You will have weeds to pull
and toss out on a daily basis. You will have manure in your life that
is a must to deal with to have your a happy garden.
I came to the conclusion long ago that
great pay was nice, but what I found that was nicer and more
fulfilling was a job that I enjoyed doing. One that gave me more
happiness. One that I enjoyed waking up to and going to every day.
One that made me feel more like I was playing instead of working.
There were still those weeds that poked
up, but my happiness quickly got them out of the way.
I often long for a warmer place to be.
Especially during the winters! Yet here I am. Just came in from the
icy outdoors after unloading yet another load of firewood. Still cold
to the bone. Hoping some things thaw...
Most warmer places I've been don't have
the lovely mountains that please my eyes and allow my mind to wonder
and play. That allow me to go on hikes and play.
Most areas I've visited don't have the
climate that makes all the things grow that I like and enjoy growing,
as they do here. And there is that heritage of being yet one more in
the family tree to be blessed with having this farm.
That does not say though that should I
choose I can't find a small place to spend my winters. And that is
now in my mind and plans.
The youngest son says he wants to be
the next in line to buy this from me one day. He's here and usually
in the apartment above the equipment building. It was only because of
the winter nastiness coming so early this year that he didn't quite
get everything fixed up and I talked him into coming back into the
house for the winter and finishing up at his leisure next summer.
Well he can keep an eye on the house
when I'm gone like a bird for the winters and come back to my feeding
grounds of happiness for springs summers and falls.
My daughter can find someone else to
babysit the grandkids who can do as good as or better than I can
while I'm gone. When she has a few days off in a row from work they
can come visit me wherever I'll be and we can play in the warmth of a
warmer climate while sharing the warmth of out hearts.
As for the things...
I have many things. Have had many
things. Have junked many things.
The thing about things. At best they
only bring a very temporary happiness. Like children with toys on
Christmas day. The things quickly become old and forgotten. Things
bring along work. Some work is intended as part of wanting them. Some
just bring along work by giving you yet one more thing to take care
of.
Things are just things. Those that are
not really needed just eventually become just one more thing to get
rid of.
Ahh, but that perfect someone to spend
your life with.
Now there is something to make the mind
ponder.
Is there anyone who could be perfect?
To be perfect I suspect they would have
to be so much like us they would soon become boring. Then like other
things we would long to toss them on a junk pile.
Maybe instead of perfection it would be
wiser to find one we enjoy playing with. One who we feel we want to
spend the rest of our days playing with and sharing with.
One who has differences we can tolerate
or learn to tolerate yet can keep us intrigued. One that can go down
a path by theirself and share what we both have seen and learned when
our separate paths merge once again at the end of the day. Maybe even
not just a day...
I've seen very many relationships die a
slow death from strangulation. The need to be together every minute.
The failure of one who can't play alone for awhile. Or has fears of
playing alone on the path of day to day life, or fears of the other
playing without them.
If you can't trust them then why be
with them in the first place!
I guess for me there may never be a
someone.
One who could tolerate that desire I
have to help those I find that could use some help. The lost kittens
and puppies. The way I take them under my wing to help heal them. The
care and affection I show them to allow them see they are not alone
and someone does care. The way and hours I listen to them, play with
them until they go on their way down their own paths with a different
perspective and renewed hope.
Though it was by no means easy, I've
come to accept that.
Like everything I've mentioned here
it's just one more choice.
Should you find there is not a smile on
your face or in your mind, maybe you should consider a choice of a
change.
Ahh, but what does a smiling fool on a
hill know : )
Well I do know I'm hungry and about to
go into the kitchen to play awhile.
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